I can’t cope

[tyme]

Rose from the dead? @Captain24 

I'm glad you got up and about a bit. Do you still have a fever?

TW: SI

Content/trigger warning

As for the SI, what when the thoughts come, what happens for you?

[Captain24]

Hey @Bow 

Welcome back!!! 

I hope your trip was great…

I have a question.. did you get a white Christmas?? I was thinking of you in Christmas Day! 

[Snowie]

Well done on achieving things today @Captain24 especially since you haven't been well.

Showering can be such a huge task sometimes.

You should be proud of yourself.

[Jynx]

@Snowie Ahhh thank you for your errand running Mr Snowie!! Haha 

Yeah that's it, there's always such cool finds!! I sometimes just enjoy going to look at all the things, not to buy - just to think about what that person's life might have been like... Get me those mad sonder vibes! Just in case, this is what sonder means:

[Captain24]

Definitely rose from the dead @tyme 

I do still have a slight fever and I’m ridiculously tired. It’s like I just have a cold now. 

I can’t do a trigger box from my phone!  Feels free to delete it. 

TW: SI

Content/trigger warning

There is just the feeling of not wanting to be alive. I constantly just wish I was dead. I feel like I have nothing to live for, other than my dogs. I have lost hope that I can get better and stay better. I feel like I’m not worth being alive. I don’t feel like I’m a good enough person to be alive. An urge sweeps over me to follow through with it. Then I have the SH urge wondering if that will lessen the SI urge. 

[Bow]

@Captain24  No we didn’t 😞  we had some really cold days though. Like -1 but feels like -7.8 the wind made it worse. 

we did get some snow falling in Paris but not enough for it to settle. We were sitting outside having dinner at a cute Paris restaurant and it started falling. Daughter was scooping it up off the tables around us.  She held it out in her hand and I flicked it up into her face!

[Jynx]

@Captain24 clean PJs sounds sooo nice!! Good on ya!

I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with these super heavy thoughts darlin. I can't imagine the sickness is helping - your body has no energy for positive thinking! 

What book are you reading at the moment?

[tyme]

Actually, the SI is probably more common than you think. 

@Captain24 

TW: SI

Content/trigger warning

I certainly went through years of it. I was alive purely to want to die... and yes, it was a really rough patch.

[Captain24]

That’s a shame @Bow. That’s not as cold as I thought. Some mornings when I finish work it’s -5.

That sounds so quaint. A cute little restaurant with snow falling. Sounds like a scene from a movie! Has your daughter seen snow before?

[Captain24]

I feel a lot fresher @Jynx 

I’m reading John Farnham book. It’s really good. You can tell he has written it as it sounds like him when you read it.

Do you read?