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Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022

I promised pdoc I would use ice and not sh. By ice I mean frozen water.

 

It will be interesting to follow this topic.

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022

I know what you mean chibam; that was me in lockdown. People talk about 'thoughts of' SH, but in a clinical way that doesn't capture how it's not just a thought, but feels like a really good idea/obvious coping means/only option. Which in our saner moments we have to reject, but I relate to what you're saying without wanting to support it or say what's typical.
I'm also sure you didn't mean to stigmatise by saying 'I'm not a habitual self harmer', but in a thread all about de-stigmatising can I say that distancing ourselves from an identity associated with an action kinda is stigmatising that identity a bit? I did that. I am one. But I feel judgement about it acutely.
❤️

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022

Thank you to @chibam and to @Magpie2 (as well as everyone else who has contributed thus far 💙).

I think @chibam and @Magpie2 you both raise some really thought provoking points, namely, who/what falls into the category of self harm, and also the stigmatisation around it (which I'm sure as you pointed out @Magpie2, was not @chibam's intention 😊).

If I may speak to my experience – yes, I believe it can be one off, and in my case it was driven by a set of circumstances at the time that were unbearable. Once I removed myself from that situation I have not experienced this type of urge again (was many years ago now). That being said, I completely understand the stigmatisation around this @Magpie2 because if I'm honest, just writing candidly here I'm acutely aware of how it may be perceived. It's funny isn't it...I've never spoken about it, beyond with my therapist at the time, and why is that? Perhaps this opens up the door to also discuss the stigma around it. Thank you again to both of you for your important contributions to this discussion.

Rhye ☘️

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022

Thank you to everyone who has shared @Bow for sharing those useful resources. I also received something similar from my psychologist and I'm exploring distress tolerance in myself at the moment. 

@greenpea Pea, sorry to hear you're having those urges and I hope you're reaching out to your supports about it? Here with you 💝

@Eden1919 🙏Thank you for sharing your recovery journey with us and it looks like this has raised some questions for you to explore more.

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022


@chibam wrote:

@Paperdaisy wrote:

Please note: The purpose of this discussion is to talk about ways of coping with distress. I encourage you to review the community guidelines  and please be mindful when talking about self-harm. Thank you 💝


I hope this is not too far off-topic. Apologies if it is. 😬

 

But has anyone ever had a once-off incident where they suddenly just lose control and just start self-harming, with no previous or future history of self-harm?

 

When we talk about self harm, I get the impression that it's generally meant as a sort of habitual behavior, like smoking. You don't tend to think of self harmers as people who suddenly do it once and then never again.

 

I'm not a habitual self harmer - not even in the occasional sense of "I might do it once every two or three years". But I had this incident once where I started doing it, with no previous history, and I've never done it again.

 

Also, I get the impression that, when most people talk about self harm, there's the implication of some level of deliberateness in the deed. Like they are in control of their bodies while they do it. But that wasn't my experiance at all. In my case, it was like my body was just running away without me, and I couldn't stop it, so I just had to sit there and take it.

 

But I guess the weird thing about it was that I wasn't particularly interested in stopping it, either. So it's not like I was fighting myself, or anything. I think I'd just given up at that point.

 

Is that typical for self harm incidents?


@chibam I'm be no means an expert but I think once off is not uncommon and there are all different types of behaviours around this. Thank you for sharing your experience, it's really valuable to get different experiences as it helps break down the stigma but it's also important to acknowledge that it's different for everyone. It's interesting you get the impression someone is in control of what they are doing "Like they are in control of their bodies while they do it." I'm wondering if you think the stigma around this is what has lead to that belief? As you have mentioned, it can also be a very unintentional experience and there are many different reasons it occurs. You mentioned you had "given up" in your experience of it and I'm sorry to hear that happened to you, I imagine that was a very difficult place to be in. 

Thank you for sharing your experience 💝

I'm wondering how you manage distress tolerance all those other times that you didn't have this one off experience? 

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022

@Eve7 It's great to hear you have that boundary in place and have an alternative that works for you 💝

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022


@Magpie2 wrote:

I'm also sure you didn't mean to stigmatise by saying 'I'm not a habitual self harmer', but in a thread all about de-stigmatising can I say that distancing ourselves from an identity associated with an action kinda is stigmatising that identity a bit? I did that. I am one. But I feel judgement about it acutely.
❤️

@Magpie2 Thank you for sharing your experience and raising this issue about stigma. It's an important one. 

How do you manage distress now in a safer way? 💝

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022

The best tool I have found to help with thoughts of self harm is Kaiko Wrist Spikey. It is a metal bracelet that can be used to apply pressure to the arm. It can provide an "ouch" sensation without harm to the skin. The webpage is quite detailed & the co-founder Jo, an OT is great at answering any questions you may have.

   Kaiko wrist spikey.jpg

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022

Please don’t get me wrong @Paperdaisy I still struggle with sh and some days I stuff up which I did yesterday so it was interesting that this topic came up when I was right in the middle of the struggle.

 

Reading yesterday’s posts was a bit of a wake up call to me. Right time, right place and better response today.

Re: Self Harm Awareness Month- March 2022

Sorry to hear you're still struggling with that @Eve7 unfortunately, recovery is not linear but it sounds like you have good awareness and supports in place. I wish you the very best 💝

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